#Essential

Well, it’s been a minute since I’ve done this….but it’s time…

When we were closed down by executive order, we figured a few weeks and it would all be over with and life would be back to normal. Boy were we mistaken. We all patiently waited. We have watched other states begin to reopen. We all followed the orders and rules handed down. We were given the impression 2 weeks ago that Gyms and other fitness related businesses would be included in the phase 2 reopening of our state. Gym owners all worked on their reopening plans, modified schedules, worked out how classes would be held following the new suggested guidelines. At 5 pm yesterday we were ready and geared up to go ahead and hear those words …Phase 2 is beginning this Friday. Well…we heard those words, except….there was a change….Gyms were being categorized with entertainment venues! What? Gyms needed to remain closed. FOR 5 ADDITIONAL WEEKS. The reasoning behind this was not explained during the press conference. For those of us who either own these facilities, along with everyone who belongs to one….It made zero sense. So now…at this point in time…I’d like to get a few points out there…..This may be a long read….but please, bear with me…as I’ve been thinking about all of this for several weeks now….

Firstly, let me make clear this is about way more than membership dues. While yes…this is important, this is the livelyhood of some….this is how they feed their families…There is a much larger picture. I can speak for our gym, but I know a lot of MMA/BJJ/Boxing gyms will be on the same page.

Physical Health. Let’s start there. It has been proven, time and time again, (yes…even with the Corona) that your chances of getting sick decreases if you are physically healthy. Physical health includes so much more than someones weight. When your Blood pressure begins to drop, and you are able to be taken off your Medication because you’ve been training every day….we celebrate with you. When you’ve had high cholesterol for years, but you’ve changed your eating habits, because that helps you when you are on the mats also….and your Cholesteral #’s begin to drop…we celebrate with you again! When you begin to feel better all around…building your self confidence, making better life decisions, keeping a positive attitude and outlook, again, we are right by your side…cheering you on. This leads me to the topic of Mental health….

Here we go…I can give countless reasons why our gym is good for your soul. (Again…I know so many other gyms in the MMA/BJJ/Boxing community that are on the same page, have the same thoughts, morals, values, experiences) A few instances come to my mind. To begin, we’ve had several teenagers (and adults to be honest), who haven’t had the greatest life. No direction. Life spinning out of control. Depression. headed down a path of serious trouble. Self destruction. No where to turn. No support system. Alone. From the minute they walk through the doors, they are given a chance to have that all change. Building their own confidence. Having an amazing support system. And that support system includes every single person out there on the mats. When you train with someone, you form a bond. When there is a group of you training together, you form a brotherhood, a family bond. You begin to feel that you have an actual place to turn. You have that guidance that is sometimes needed in life. You have people that will have your back. You have people who will help you when you are down. You become a support system for other people as well. This type of mentality carries with you outside of they Gym, making it a positive aspect for the community as a whole.

Let’s carry this topic over to our kids. Let’s talk about the whole ADHD issue. We have SO many children who have this issue. Who have started taking our kids classes, and have had these issues begin to fade. It’s amazing to see the transformation in them. To watch them basically start out when they are 5 or 6 years old….to see them walk onto those mats, most are a little scared, and develop so many amazing skills. They say it takes a village…sometimes it truly does. One of my favorite things to watch, are the kids class belt tests. These kids give their all. These kids push themselves harder than they ever could have imagined. Parents and family members who are watching are amazed. These kids have such a sense of pride, not only for themselves, but for eachother. When one set of testing is complete, there is usually a group of kids , who are exhausted from their own test….sitting at the edge of the mats, cheering on and supporting their teammates. One thing that i’ve seen happen, numerous times, during testing… Kids are paired up and have to grapple or spar eachother. They are tired, they are mentally and physically wore down, and they are having to physically compete with a teammate. If you listen closely, sometimes you will hear the 2 kids actually pushing eachother. Don’t quit, you’ve got this, you’re doing good, keep going. All while actually having to compete against eachother. They form that same bond. They are a Team.b Besides testing time, it makes me extremely proud to watch these kids basically grow up in the gym. Parents will tell you, learning control, discipline, respect out on the mats, helps them at home, helps them at school. It affects their daily decision making.

A few other things…The benefits for Law enforcement. I shouldn’t need to explain this…but physical benefits. Hand to hand combat. Yep…if you only have your hand to hand combat training once or twice per year, participating in a full contact sport such as MMA or BJJ will keep you fresh. Keeping in shape is extremely important, but also knowing what to do, how to handle yourself in a one on one confrontational situation is up there on the list! And again, the community as a whole aspect…i’ll get into that in a bit. Let’s talk about veterans…a few proven facts….therapists have actually “prescribed” MMA/BJJ training to veterans with PTSD. Coming home, going from a 100% military lifestyle, having that urgency, that camaraderie…to regular civilian life can be very hard. Developing that bond, having that physical push, that urgency in training, that competative feeling again has been proven time and time again to help. Again, community as a whole.

So, if i’m going to keep using the term Community as a whole, let me discuss. You have people from ALL walks of life, who without the gym, would have probably never met. But yet they’ve all come together. You have men, women, young, old, black, white, shy, outgoing, overacheivers, lots of experience, no experience, competative, not competative…..all out there together. This carries with us into our personal lives. Families begin training together…kids, parents, grandparents. All carried with us outside the walls of the gym. Friendships formed, that would never have formed. You have bonds, you have a family. Making our community a better place….together.

So since this is my blog, I’m going to end with my On a personal note portion. I apologize if I get long winded, i’ll try my best not to. We, in the MMA/BJJ community have been extremely patient. Our members have been extremely patient. We understood the threat, the fears, the unknown. We have sat back and listened and followed the rules. We keep our gyms clean and sanitized…We are adults….we know the risks. There are risks associated with the type of training that goes on at our gym. Everyone who trains there is well aware. There are also benefits that outweigh the risks. We also are well aware of them. We have been watching some of our members who have come from a dark place slowly descend backwards. Why on the face of this earth would anyone want to allow that to happen? Why ? Our governor seems to view gyms as “workout entertainment venues”?? that was how we were categorized yesterday afternoon. There are places that are being allowed to open that have a very different level of cleanliness. Sleep away camps???? I’m not badmouthing any camps…but come on! I’ve been to some….and I can assure you that we are taking VERY different measures regularly. We have cleaned and sanitized the gym since way before The ‘Rona appeared. We have had strict policies in place since the beginning regarding illnesses. You can ask anyone who trains…..how quickly I will turn someone who has been sick right around to go home. I don’t play. If you message me to ask about trainging….and you or a family member has had something contagious….my answer is no. Give it a few days, We don’t want to share that kind of Love!

We have fighters who NEED to train in the proper setting, with proper instruction. Not on the street. Not in their backyards. Not in their garages. We have kids who have been inside their houses with minimal physical activity for too long. They want to come back to class. They are longing for that structure. We have other members who need that daily push. I’m told, just go on and open up….again, easier said than done. A quick solution could lead to a bigger problem, including fines and potentially losing our business licence. That would be much worse in the long run to everyone who is counting on us. I can promise you all, we WILL reopen, it’s just a matter of when. I am hoping things can be viewed differently as to what our Gym is. I am hoping that it is seen as more than a unclean germ spreading entertainment venue. The value put on our gym and the people who are a part of the gym family is priceless. What we do, what we stand for, our community as a whole would benefit from us being allowed to open our doors without facing any legal reprecussions. Please take a long hard look at the risks you take by going to the huge stores that have been open since day one. Please take a long hard look at how sitting at home has been HORRIBLE for people, physically and mentally speaking. If we are forced to wait the full 5 weeks so be it….but I feel that an uprising is headed our way.

It’s FIGHT WEEK! the calm before the storm…Week 7

As the title of this weeks blog explains…it’s finally here. Fight week. what we’ve been working towards. It all comes down to this. One night. One fighter steps in the cage. They’ve had the team with them every step of the way…..but come Saturday night, they’ll walk out to that cage, surrounded by their team for the final time…..and once they step into that cage…it’s their time…

You’ll have to excuse me if this little blog is a bit jumbled up and kind of jumps everywhere. When I started this weekly blog to follow this fight camp…I wanted to give everyone a little bit of an inside view of things that aren’t normally seen. There’s been so many things I actually wanted to incorporate, but never really got the chance….Maybe after the fights, I’ll keep it going… It’s been a hard few weeks…the whole team has been giving 110% every single day. Everyone is tired. But at the same time….everyone is so ready for this coming weekend.

We’ve had tickets selling for the fights…T-shirts are being picked up…and we had special polo’s made for the corners for this one….Pink….TKO for the Tata’s. Proceeds from this fight night are going towards Breast Cancer awareness. You are supposed to sport your pink on Saturday to show your support…well…they’re PINK!

So…I have a t-shirt…that my friend made for me…a special fight week shirt….and let me tell you, i’ll wear it…every single day this week. It’s a little warning…in a funny way….seriously though…No, I’m not fighting…but as the owner of the school, manager, “mom”, friend, do-er of anything and everything that needs to be done…it can be a stressful week…that mixed with my contagious enthusiasm and every other emotion under the sun…can be a interesting combo…even when things are running 100% smoothly…my brain will be going 9 million miles per hour this week. I will think of every last thing that will happen, might happen, needs to happen, want to happen, don’t want to happen. Every scenario will play in my head….all day….every day. The 2 weeks leading up to a fight…tends to be the time, where anything out of the ordinary aka “stupid” that could possibly come my way… is going to come my way. Am I snappy…yes. Extremely. Will my level of sarcasm be at an all time high…Yup…pretty much. It’s all good…because everything gets done…everyone is where they need to be…everything runs smooth (for the most part. This is the week to NOT come at me with ridiculousness. 🙂

We’ve had a really good past few weeks. This camp has really shown what we are made of. In the past, there wasn’t too much “cross training”…however, we believe that it is important to the benefit of everyone involved. The bonds that have been made are most certainly unbreakable. There is now a stronger support system….a stronger sense of family. When we are all working together as one, you feel the difference. JC and Justin both have fights this coming weekend also…different venue than us…but they’ve been putting in work at their gyms…and coming to train with us also. They push us, we push them…they’ve got that drive…that energy. Everyone on those mats has that drive. Everyone has that positive energy. Everyone working towards that one common goal. Next Saturday…will be crazy trying to keep up with their fights while being at ours!

I’ve got my suitcase to pack. I’ve got my Medical bag and handwrapping bag to get together. I’ve got an itinerary to type up. That will be done Monday morning after kickboxing. Now…I type that itinerary up for a reason. Pet peeve of this week…questions directed my way….that are on the itinerary. So…I keep a copy on my phone…and send it as my answer… as the answers are all there. (There’s that little touch of sarcasm) Seriously though, found out where weigh ins will be…. the place where weigh ins will be …. is the bomb. Really good cheese fries. Really good ranch. That can make or break an entire weekend….sounds odd…but those of you who know me…know….that’s my thing. Cheese fries…

This fight weekend will be a bit different…for me anyway…our best friends, who are always there for the trip up, weigh ins, Applebees prefight meal, etc…..won’t be there until Saturday night, when the actual fights start!!!!! WHAT?!? I hope I make it without my Tracy there for that first 24 hours….Really though, I’m super thankful and BEYOND grateful that they’re coming back early from a little vacation to get to the fights. I mean…who else will bring me my fight night diet coke! I kid…I kid….but Tracy…I know you are reading this…you better have your phone ready for the mass texts that will inandate your phone!!!! (and for real…that diet coke…the juju must go on)

As I close out this rambling collection of thoughts, I need to say it once again. There has been such an amazing support system. Such a great group of people working together each night, each week. I know that there are times that the ones who are fighting are having to do things separately…or a bit differently than everyone else. That doesn’t mean anyone is any less part of the team. There are so many times that everyone is working together as well. It’s the way that both of those things can come together that makes it work. There’s always learning to be done. I know that we are at the point where everyone is tired. Everyone…especially the fighters…is ready for Saturday night. If i’ve heard it once, i’ve heard it 100 times…..I just wish it were August 10th ….I just want to get this done now. It’ll be here…it will be here quickly….and it will be worth every last ounce of everything that has been given over these past several weeks. I’m proud of everyone who is out there. Everyone who pushes the fighters. I’m so so so proud of each of the fighters. I know it has not been easy for any of them. It never is…but as we all will get to see on August 10th….They were born for this.

Contagious Enthusiam, Week 5

Well, I’m going to start off where we left off last week. 1st, we have an opponent for Grace!!!!!! When this was all confirmed, emails sent, everyone in agreement….there was definitely a wave of that “Contagious Enthusiasm”. This term was given to me several years ago by one of my friends, who would see just how my emotions would be crazy leading up to the fights. I called it “fight brain” for a while…still do…but contagious enthusiasm fits much better…as there are so many that share in that enthusiasm right alongside me!

I swear, when things just start coming together, you know…it’s going to be a good night. Things were getting a little stressful on the Grace end of things, training so hard…without knowing if she would have an opponent or not. And right when she was at the end of her rope…Bam…just like that, Jimi, the SFL promoter, called me with a potential matchup for her. Perfect timing I must say!

This week all in all has been a good week. We got the tickets in the mail. whoop whoop! We had several people come to the gym to do a little cross training. It’s something that I really feel is important. It seems to give everyone a little edge. It seems to help with sharpening the skills that need to be sharpened. I am so thankful that there are other gyms and other fighters that feel the same way and take the time to come down. A great learning experice for both sides…all while getting to put in some extra work. As the saying goes…Iron sharpens Iron.

As with any of the final few weeks leading up to the fight, things are getting heated. Literally and figuratively. We’ve been in a severe heat wave…which when I started this fight camp blog up, I had mentioned how hot it was inside the gym while they’re training. Well, it’s hotter. They just push on through it, knowing the end product will be so much better for it. So right along with the intensity of the heat…the intensity of training has elevated. Every week, it gets harder, and they just get better. The ones who are fighting have been through it before…they know…the weeks leading up to the fight are no joke. They dread it and love it at the same time. The rest of the team, who is out there nightly with them, are realizing what it takes. They’re having to keep pushing with the fighters. If not them, then who? It takes an entire team to get each individual fighter to where they need to be before they make that walk to the cage. For some individuals, this is where they begin to think to themselves…Maybe I want to do this one day and their own fire is lit. The process for them is just beginning, but it’s a good test.

Again, as I tend to repeat, every time I write one of these little blogs, I have to say how proud I am. To see their tears…to see their smiles…to see them lift each other every single day is something that the crowd doesn’t see. The behind the scenes. The love and respect the entire team has for eachother. I’ll be walking through the store…think about a certain moment, and I can’t help but spread that contagious enthusiasm.

We area little less than 3 weeks out now…everything has seemed to fall right into place. Everyone is where they need to be, which is good…as training about to get even harder. Our friends who have come down, all have fights coming up as well, so looking forward to seeing some more cross training again this week. Shirts will be ready…tickets will be bought….all will add to even more excitement and anticipation. The weeks are flying by even faster now it seems.

My contagious enthusiasm will definitely be more noticeable. “fight brain” i’ll just apologize now for those who deal with me on the daily. Fingers crossed for smooth sailing for the next few weeks. My favorite saying to put on the board at the gym before a fight….You have not come this far to walk away without the victory. Keep pushing.

sheer exhaustion at the end of the night

Week 4, Grace & Grit

Well, it’s Sunday night, and as I type this, we are anxiously awaiting the official announcement of one of the bouts…As of now…we have 3 confirmed bouts (and as we all know that all can change about 73 times in the next 27 days!) The final fighter we have to get an opponent…is our Grace….gasp!

Grace. She is our first female to have fought under the Team R.O.C. name. Grace… She’s the girl who walks into the gym, barely says a word…but has a presence about her. Grace…the one that the little girls look at and say, WOW…I wanna be like her! When we have new classes start up…the new ladies all come up to me after seeing her in action and say, “what do I need to do to be like her?”. She is the girl, who all the new guys feel like they need to go kind of easy on…you know…because she looks so tiny and frail…then they learn pretty quickly. Grace is a pretty tough cookie and she will whoop your ass without batting an eye. Now, most anything I say about Grace can be said about all of our male fighters. But honestly…female fighters are far and few between and they get looked upon a bit differently by the outside world. To see her go through what would make most men crumble…is truly something to see. She goes to work with bruises on her face, getting told, “you shouldn’t fight…you’ll ruin your pretty face”. ohhhhkayyyyy…I wish I could see the look on her face when she is told things like that. Then there is the fun of weight cutting when you are a female. Sometimes, when you are a certain weight, mother nature decides…guess what…you are going to GAIN 5 lbs by tomorrow morning! Not only that…the extreme emotional moods wings that can come along with that monthly weight gain, along with being pushed to your limits. She just has to push through. No excuses. Just a little example why we all look at Grace in a different light.

Most of Grace’s training partners outweigh her by bit. She get’s hit…by men…in the face…in the body. She gets slammed on the ground. She gets submitted. She’s got to run, carrying people heavier than she is on her back. When Grace first came to us, she was almost 16. She came in, after taking private lessons for about a year, and told us…I want to fight in a cage. We were starting up a fight camp…and there were several people who also had said they wanted to fight in a cage in the future as well. As usual, we say, ok, cool, go through it with the fighters, see how you do, see if it’s still something you want once you see what they go through, what the team goes through. Months went by, and out of all the new people who said they wanted to fight in a cage one day….Grace was still there. Hanging in there. Still saying she would get in that cage. Long story short, 5 fight camps and several years later, she finally got her chance. What a show she put on. She won. Of course…because Grace…always wins in the end. Now, we just wait, with fingers crossed, we have another opponent come through for her for this fight card. Again, far and few between are the female fighters…but Grace is ready. She’s on point with her diet and weight, lessons learned the hard way for her first fight. But none the less, lesson learned…She wore a shirt this week that perfectly described her personality. Hangry. Yup. That’s her.

So the next topic of the week, is the building excitement in the gym. As we get closer, everyone wants to know about opponents. I guess when opponents are set, it seems like things are a bit more “real”. Everyone loves to make predictions. Everyone loves to hear about the opponents…who they are, what’s their record, where they train, etc…

It’s like you can start to feel the excitement. You can feel the energy. You can finally put a face to the name. You know who is going in that cage with our fighters. It brings out all kinds of reactions and emotions. Sometimes we do a happy dance (yes, literally, we do a happy dance)..sometimes we take a deep breath…most of the times, finding out that an opponent is locked in, simply brings a smile to everyone we tell, yep…we’ve got that one locked in now. There are those of us who watch the previous fight videos of our opponents. I’ve got myself an “assistant” now, Cam, who is in the kids class. He is one of our kids at the gym. Every opponent we get, Cam is gonna get that name and pull up whatever fights he can. He watches them over and over and studies them… I found out this past year, that he’s done this for the past few fights…doing his own research for each fight. I think it’s great, to see a kid get so involved like that, all on his own. So, I had to make him my official “research assistant”! When we get a bout confirmed, it seems to light a fire on the mats. It seems to give another little push to the fighters right when it’s needed.

So now we are just under 1 month until fight night. I personally cannot WAIT until the match ups are announced. The past few weeks have been hard, and the next few weeks will only get harder. Time for them to tweak the little things, work on things they need to work on. For me, the next few weeks will fly. It’s always a whirlwind. I’ll have the weekend of August 10th in the back of my mind constantly. I’ll watch them all as much I can, closely. Mamabird to all of them. I’ll pray for them all. For them to stay safe, strong, healthy and courageous over the next several weeks. Whatever needs to be done, will get done. But most of all, as I count down the days, watching it all happen, the unsurpassable pride I feel will grow. This is something I’ll never be able to put into words. The night of August 10th, however, you’ll see it all over my face.

***edit after the fact…..

First bout announcement…a “little bit of excitement…..” the rematch.

Week 3 of fight camp, Being a Coach is just as important as having a coach

For most fighters…there is a coach…if not a team of coaches. I’m not knocking anyone who trains without a coach…but there is something different that happens on those mats when you have someone to direct and guide you. When it comes to our coaches, they’ve all been in a cage before becoming a coach. They all know what the fighters go through. What it takes to get there.

All of our coaches come from different walks of life… Different ages. Different home lives. Different backgrounds. Different levels of experience. Different areas of expertise. Different ways of looking at things. But all of them have a similar goal when it comes to being a coach. They want to see their students be succesful. On the mats, in a cage…and in their lives in general. There is a common ground. A common goal. A bond. They’re able to take what they’ve learned, what they’ve done and combine it with their own ideas and techniques to help their students become something better than they could ever imagine they would be.

When asked, most of them had zero intentions of actually becoming coaches. They all ended up in this role a bit differently. Like I said before, they all started out as fighters. The transition from being a fighter to becoming a coach may have happened after taking a complete break, after fighting, moving on with life and all of it’s adventures. The transition may have taken place slowly, without even them even realizing it was happening. It may have happened “overnight”, with something happening that made them say…I want to help…I see what needs work…I want to share what I know to make others better. But again, there was something in all of their lives that put them where they are now…and even though they may each have their own reasons, the end goals are all the same. They want to see the atheletes that they are training succeed. They want to see them take what they give them and use it. Not only in the gym, but in their lives. They want the fighters to have more confidence in their abilities. Being a coach has a way of affecting your entire mental state. You share the highs and the lows of your fighters. You feel what they feel. You know that if you able to overcome adversity, you’ll be able to lead them through adversity. If you can push them to their breaking point, you know that you’ll be there to pull them through it and lift them up, both mentally and physically. What they’ve found is each fighter responds differently, but the constant push is what they know they have to do. It’s what they are able to give at this point. When they see a fighter “break” during training, they physically push them, which in turn, shows them that mentally they’re capable of anything that is in front of them. You can be in the best physical shape of your life….yes that is a plus…but you need to have the proper mindset as well. You have to be able to control your emotions and learn to channel them into your training. That’s part of what these coaches do. I’ve witnessed both wins and losses. Losses are always taken hard. There are losses that make a fighter question everything they’ve been doing. Everything they’ve been through. I’ve also witnessed how only a coach or trainer has the right words to say. I’ve seen how deep those words can sink in. I’ve seen amazing support in the locker room after a loss, when all the hype is over. When the crowd is quiet. When the only thing left to do is help lift up a broken spirit. I’ve seen it.

Consistency. This word was used several times when I asked the coaches to each answer a few questions pertaining to how they feel about different situations. When watching students, and deciding whether or not they should compete. Consistency was the one factor that came up several times. These coaches can tell. They are not only sharing skills when they are teaching, but they are watching. They’re watching to see who is doing what. If you aren’t putting in the time, if you aren’t putting in the effort…the role that these coaches play can be hard sometimes…in having to tell people…”you just aren’t ready yet. You haven’t shown the effort it takes to compete” When they are out on those mats coaching, listening to people talk about how they want to compete, how they want to fight, and at the same time, seeing those same people wasting time, goofing off, having a lot of down time…it shows them who is serious about learning, which of their students is out there truly trying to reach their goals. They can see which students put in extra effort, extra training time outside the regular gym hours. They can see who is devoted. They can tell who is there to not only learn, but who is being a good teammate and not hindering the people who ARE trying to reach their goals. Sometimes being a coach means you have to let people know things they don’t necessarily want to hear. Sometimes those things will help a person grow…sometimes feelings will get hurt and no growth comes from it. I know they all hope that their words will have some type of positive affect and that their students will hear them and grown from them.

Each of our coaches has a designated night to do their thing. Some classes the fighters are separated and work on different things during “fight camp”. Some training sessions are no different throughout the year…fight camp or not…you are going to be learning and drilling to use your skills all of the time…not just one big night. Some training sessions are ramped up…and everyone in that class is a fighter for that hour. Everyone is getting ready for a fight and only the strong survive….and so far…everyone has survived. Now granted….i’ve seen people have to run to the garbage can to get sick. I’ve seen people have to literally crawl off the mats after laying there for quite some time….having to regain just a few ounces of strength! But everyone has survived!

I am in the gym every day. I watch not only the fighters train, but the coaches. What they do…how they interact with the fighters and the rest of the team. I know that they want the fighters to be successful. This means when they win…awesome….they’ll celebrate together They’ll be on top of that mountain with them. When there is a loss, I know for a fact, the coaches feel that loss with them. I know they don’t want that loss to be “just a loss”. They want it to be a lesson…not only for the fighters, but for themselves as well. What needs to change, if anything. What can be done differently? I know that they want people to understand that this is not just some barberic out for blood sport. I know they want people to understand that it is an art. There is beauty in everything that they do. They technique they use is only acheived by having that consistency …(there’s that word again) I know that they want the team…the fighters themselves to have fun. There is something strange about saying that…seeing what they go through…it’s certainly not for everyone. The constant hours/days/weeks/months/years that are put into training. The diets, bruises, black eyes, hurt egos, bloody noses, rib injuries, leg injuries, sore muscles, stresses, the list goes on and on…..and for some reason…it’s their choice…they somehow find it fun. And that’s important. Very, very important.

I’ve taken parts and bits of several answers that were given to me by coaches. Their answers all were pretty much what I expected them to be, with a few added insights. I teach kickboxing classes alongside these coaches. I personally see what they see. I have an outside view of their classes. I have the honor to watch them mold and shape their students. I get to watch what they do to turn people into fighters.

**It’s the closest feeling to being in the cage without having to fight. When you train/prepare someone for a fight, you see everything they go through. The blood, sweat and tears. You tain these fighters for 6 – 8 weeks. You start to get emotionally invested almost like it’s your fight. Then it’s fight night, they walk out, get in that cage and your heart starts pounding. Like it’s you in there.** From Joe Hipps, that’s a great way to sum up how it feels. I think everyone who is on those mats with the fighters has gotten to experience that feeling.

“Satisfaction when you see firsthand a fighter utilizing what you have been teaching” – Tom Cuozzi (on his favorite part of being a coach)

“It makes me feel like I have made a positive diference in someone’s life, or even saved someone’s life for starting this journey. It has saved mine” – Will Combs (on what he gets out of coaching)

“Opinion means very little when it’s time, all you revert back to is what you’ve done leading up to competition time and that’s my favortie part because you can’t cheat hard work. It’s a simple but hard path” – Jazz Ortiz

“Oh and I want to see them cry…” – Joe Hipps

And from me….there is truly nothing like it…

Week 2…The countdown continues…

Well, week 2 of this fight camp went pretty much as expected. Nothing crazy to report…just running it through a pretty significant heat wave here in NC. Hitting almost triple digits daily, with what seems to be 110% humidity… The mood in the gym is..well..it’s hot…really hot…and it’s still only just June. But hey, that’s a plus for those weight cuts! All the fighters names and info has been sent to the Jimi, the promoter…and now we wait on opponents. “Any word on opponents?” – everyone asks.

Monday was a good night…for everyone really. The fighters had to spar, with everyone…the only catch, they could not hit or kick back. Only defend and move. Now, that’s what i’m talking about! Although we were reminded several times…after tonight…we can hit you back…keep that in mind. (Earning me my first bloody nose from a straight shot to my nose from De on Wednesday morning…Thaaaaanks De!)

Tuesday, we had a little suprise show up. German Will! Will trained a few years ago when he was an exchange student for his senior year in school. Back for a 2 week visit, he decided to stop by and train. Jumping right into this camp as if he never left. Partnered with Tommy at first, we realized he’s a good match. Strong. Athletic. And he has continued training while back home in Germany. With the strong German accent he has, if you don’t look… it’s like having Arnold Schwarzenegger pushing you.

We are all there every day…I know i’ve said before about the support and push you get from your team. Daily. This week I was moved by how this “kid” shows up after years of not being here…and is still part of the team…pushing. Going with everyone. At one point I heard him say, I’ll go with you so you don’t do it alone, no quitting…and they kept going. That is an almost daily thing that happens on those mats. Even when people don’t HAVE to do something, they do it right along with those fighters. It’s things like that, actions, gestures, moments that I see. Everyone who comes to the fights sees the final product. Not everyone sees the steps, the people or the work that it takes to help them get there. When they are at the point of wanting to stop. Wanting a break. Feeling like they cannot do one more thing…It’s little things like that, which I see daily, that motivate these fighters to keep going.

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1 foot in the circle, you can’t run. Body shots. blocking and getting hit, over and over and over

Everyone wants to be a fighter…

Until it’s time to do what a fighter does… These fighters are preparing to step in a cage. And fight. With someone, who literally, is going into that cage to try hurt them. To get that win. That is their ultimate goal. Hit your opponent, hard. Submit your opponent. Win. All while everyone is watching. All eyes are on you. It’s a sport, yes…but they’re not playing a game. They can’t say I’m too tired today or I need the day off today. They need to be ready. Not only physically, but mentally. The mental part plays a big role. I’ve been told, that from the minute they tell me they want to be on that card, they eat, sleep and breath it. They get an opponent. They know that opponent is training just as hard as they are. They have the same goal. But there is only one winner. Everyone handles it differently. But it’s constantly on their mind. At work, at school, at home, before they go to bed, as soon as they wake up, and especially at the gym. Everyone around them plays important roles. Some people are great training partners, they go hard, they don’t stop…you’d think they were the ones training for a fight. They’ve got coaches who push and push and push. They have seen what these fighters are capable of and they never ever let them quit. They’ve got people who are their motivation, their cheerleaders, the people who look up to them. At our gym, they’ve got kids watching them. Little ones from the kids class follow these fighters, watch them, look up to them like they are super heroes. In their eyes, they are everything that they want to be They’ve got people who are there for them when they are mentally drained on top of being physically spent. And then, mixed in there…they’ve got some comic relief. Sometimes the stress of it all gets to the point, where there is nothing you can do but find something to laugh at.

The countdown continues… We are 41 days away from SFL40, fight night. The the excitement is slowly but surely building as each day passes. These next 6 weeks will fly by. The fighters have not even come close to reaching their breaking points, but they will. They always do.

“I’m really too old for this shit” – Debo White

And lastly, just to close with a big group picture…you’ll notice Zach in the middle. This year, has not been an easy year for Zack or his family….facing some serious medical issues several months back, there were days where we would get a report from his mom, where we just didn’t know what the next morning would bring. Just getting a response on certain days from him was not an easy feat for his family and doctors. As a family, we all kept Zach in our prayers…and Zach has proven to be one strong and stubborn fighter. He can walk on his own now…and even thought he can’t train, he comes in a few nights a week to be there during fight camp. Just like were he left off several months ago. Sitting in those chairs, watching, cheering on his friends as they get ready for their fights….that alone is motivation in itself! #WeAreTeamROCeden

Here we go again….fight camp week 1

A few weeks ago, I was given the idea by my best friend Tracy, to start up this blog again, and give weekly accounts of going through a fight camp….as a Gym Owner, manager, coach, and mom. I wear a lot of titles daily, but wear each one proudly. Now, I do go through it somewhat physically…but also do a lot of the behind the scenes work. People who aren’t there, just don’t know. They don’t see. Most people see the final product. The grand finale. Under the lights…in the cage. A win…or a loss. They have opinions, ideas, comments. But unless you are there…unless you see what it takes to get there…you cannot fully understand or grasp the commitment made by everyone involved. The fighters go through things, daily, that would make most people crumble, give up, quit, run away…but they dont. They get up and do it all again the next day and the day after that, and the day after that. Then you’ve got their training partners…the team and the coaches. These are the people who are out there on the mats with them, day in, day out…not for the glory…but because they’re a team. A family. They push eachother. They are not only there physically…but mentally. These are just a few things i’ll be able to try to show you as we go through the weeks leading up to the August 10th fights.

Let’s start this by talking about diet changes. A lot of fighters cut weight during the weeks leading up to their fights. There are some that fight at their walking weight. But…i’ll be honest….every one i’ve ever been around…LOVES food….And I mean LOVES food! So a good philosophy to follow…is what you put in you body…is what you put out. If you eat healthy and clean….you actually get to eat a good amount of food….it’s just not a bunch of junk. Their performance, when they’re eating clean…during training alone…is remarkably better than when they are eating bad. Now…don’t get me wrong…going from eating all the “fun” deliciousness….to a proper fighters diet….mixed with the grueling training sessions can make for tired, grouchy, angry attitudes. “hangry”

you go from this……happy….smiling face…..

To this……same person….

It gets real. Real quick!

This week…we ramped up our classes just a bit. Everyone is ready. People who haven’t been through or seen a fight camp had questions…some are nervous…some are excited. We always tell everyone who has ideas of becoming a fighter….now’s your chance….go through it with them….There are nights where we all train together. There are nights where even though training together…the fighters are doing things a bit differently. They are most certainly a source of inspiration for everyone who sees them getting ready.

At the end of several hours of training, the mats are soaked with sweat…(don’t worry, we clean them). The fighters along witht the rest of the team are usually sprawled out somewhere on the mats catching their breath. I have seen this routine, what seems like 100’s of times…and I know…this is just the beginning. They’ll all keep going. They’ll all keep pushing. They’ll all be there, together, as the fighter walks out to the cage. Again…another tradition I feel like I’ve seen a hundred times.

You hear so many times during these sessions….keep going…you’ve got this…don’t you quit….you can do this….Give it everything you’ve got! Not just from the coaches…from everyone.

This is just a tiny little tidbit of what goes on. As we start things up…I’ll get opponent names…I’ll get tickets…I’ll ask and answer approximately 389,524 questions…I’ll sell the same amount of tickets (kidding…kidding). I’ll make sure everything on our end will run as smoothly as I can possibly make it! I’ll make lists. I’ll make itineraries. I’ll give pep talks (yes…I know…if you know me….you are thinking…really???? but I do) I’ll give other talks…a bit more serious. Weight talks, diet talks, things that need to change talks…whatever needs to be done talks

I am excited to see the transformations I will see as we go throught the next several weeks. I am happy and thankful for the support system that we all have, on and off the mats! I can tell you…leading up to August 10th, SFL40, will be action packed…and intense. Be ready…. #WeAreTeamROC

Can you tell which ones were in the shark tank?

Again…just a tidbit of info….stay tuned…there’s alot more coming your way!

Walking through the fire…

I haven’t typed a blog in a while, as i’ve been a bit busy. But tonight, I have a bit too much to put into a Facebook status….so here’s a good as any place. Tonight’s blog has nothing to do with kickboxing…cakes…or MMA. It has to do with a man (& his family) who is has been walking through a fire lately….and tomorrow is a pretty big leap. As many of you who i’m friends with already know…our preacher, Ronnie Warner, was diagnosed with prostate cancer a few months ago. However, you never in a million years would have known…as he kept on living his life, helping people, caring for everyone else, leading a church, leading people to Christ….as if nothing was ever even going on. I just wanted to say a few things about this amazing human.

We didn’t always go to church. I was raised “catholic” …only going to church when necessary….weddings, funerals, baptisms, etc. When we moved to Ruffin, Little Tommy went to church with friends of ours. It just so happened to be Freedom Baptist. He was pretty young at the time…and asked if we could bring him back the following week. I obliged. I knew, from the minute I met the preacher of this Church….there was something different. Let me explain….

Preacher Ronnie….made it clear…that he did not like people “playing church”….meaning …be who you are, whether you are out on the street, at work, at the store, or in Church. Be honest. Don’t be fake. If you fake it….and say you live your life one way on Sundays…but do something completely different all week long…you are playing church. Ronnie also makes it clear…that there is no one who is perfect. There is no one who does no wrong. There has never…ever…ever been a time, where i’ve been made to feel “beneath” or “below” I’ve always walked away from Freedom Baptist Church feeling lifted and accepted for who I am (sometimes a bit rough around the edges). I know…that the church is made up of it’s members….and the atmosphere is due to them as well. But there is a leader. And that leader is Ronnie Warner.

At Tommy’s 1st fight…praying with him in the locker room…

Preacher Ronnie has been there for my family through Good times, bad times, sad times, happy times, scary times….every thing that has happened where you’d need a man of God to be there…he has been there. Without hesitation…without question. Tommy’s 1st fight, he was 14 years old. Tommy asked Ronnie and Diane to please come. What did Ronnie do? Loaded up the Church van with the teens from church to come cheer Tommy on. Not only that….he drove through torrential rains…Diane’s blood sugar dropped…they needed to find a pharmacy that had her diabetic needles…..they had to stop for food. As we waited in the locker room and didn’t think he would make it…not knowing what had happened on the trip to the venue….I received a phone call….Ronnie….saying “I’m here!! where do I go???” he swung the church van into a no parking zone….hoping he wouldn’t get a ticket or towed….ran into the venue and made it into the locker room….with minutes to spare…led Tommy in prayer before that walk to the cage. (ps. the church van did not get towed, nor did it get a ticket….he got back out and parked where he needed to) I looked over during the fight to see Diane, covering her eyes…she couldn’t watch….but Ronnie…standing up…front and center…cheering for Tommy.

Tommy and Ronnie posing before one of Tommy’s fights
Facing off with the Preacher…Ronnie always offers to come spar…lol…but never has shown up 🙂

Brandon, Ashley and Ronnie after announcing their engagement

Preacher Ronnie has also watched Ashley grown up from a little girl….Always been encouraging and uplifting. When she’s gone through hard times as a teenager, she knew she could count on having Ronnie and Diane as somewhere to turn. When Ashley and Brandon got engaged…Diane was one of the first people to know…When Ronnie announced their engagement, he gave the sweetest speech about Ashley and what she meant to him and Diane. There was no one else in this world who Ashley would rather have perform her wedding to Brandon. We found out of Ronnie’s cancer the day after mailing out all of the invitations…and of course, Ronnie and Diane’s invitation was in that stack. I was not thinking at that time of May…All I could think was WHY???? why him? of all people in this world???? he has got to defeat this….there are too many people in this community alone who look towards him for so many things! WHY??????

I cried at church that day when they told everyone. I cried in the car on the way to the store. I cried at the store. I cried when I got home. I cried when telling Ashley this news. I cried when I told my sister on the phone. I might even be crying a little now remembering how I felt that day.

2 days later…we received Ashley’s first RSVP in the mailbox. It was from Ronnie and Diane. “Accepts with pleasure” Then I cried some more.

Who comes to church dressed as a vampire???? i deserved that stake through my heart 🙂
Little Tommy’s Baptism
during VBS one year…
Ronnie takes Church security pretty seriously (VBS a few years ago)

When I had to have emergency surgery after my tonsils were removed….Ronnie showed up at the hospital. When tommy has a fight….he’s there. If he can’t make it to the fight….he calls or video chat’s tommy in the locker room to lead his pre-fight prayer. When he is passing by the house from somewhere else…he will pull in the driveway if we are outside….(but sure won’t get out of his car if ilse is outside) When my grandmother died….he called and asked if she had a church….a pastor…someone to lead her funeral service….and actually offered to go to NY if we needed someone. His Christmas service was the last church service my grandmother had gone to. He makes it a point to ask about and check on Tom when he is at work on Sundays. Did I mention 4th of July? He drives HOURS away to get fireworks….A LOT OF THEM… to put on a big show after our Church cookout every year. And what a show it is! He does all of these things and more….not only for my family. He makes it a point to know every member of his congregation. He makes it a point to care for every person he meets. He and Diane have a daughter who they raised to be a wonderful person…who now has 2 babies of her own. The love he has for those 2 babies…..is seen all over his face at the mere mention of them. He jokes…he makes people laugh…he is very brutally honest with everyone. He doesn’t sugarcoat. He keeps it as real as it gets. He let’s you know…life’s not always sunshine and rainbows. He stands for what is right. He is as real as they come. He has so many people who love him. Who look up to him. He is a true role model. There are more people praying for him tonight and will be tomorrow as he goes in for his surgery. I know he is going to get through tomorrow and the weeks ahead….just like he has gotten so many others through their life trials. He will walk through this fire….and come out like it didn’t even burn.

so…if you are reading this ….and are a praying person….even if you are not….say a prayer or 2 for this man and his family, who we love so much.

#IamAwhosover

I’ll just throw an elbow!

So here we are…Happy New Year to everyone! I’ve scrolled on the facebook a few times today, to see most everyone has a very similar resolution. Diet, exercise, get in shape this year. I hear ya. I feel ya. I’ve been there. I’m still there. I’ve had a constant struggle with my weight since I was a teenager. I’ve maintained my weight here recently…and been honestly in the best shape i’ve ever been in my life. However, It sure doesn’t come easy. And….it sure is easy to fall right off the wagon. I see a nutritionist whenever i’m able to. I get my fat to muscle ratio measured and am given pretty specific meal plans. (If I veer off of these plans, even for a few days, my body sure does feel it) Now, this past month…well, maybe a bit longer, i’ve REALLY veered off. I kind of “take December off”….or that’s the excuse I use. I shouldn’t….but…Christmas. (yep…it is a full month) So, 3 days ago, I had to kickstart my diet a bit….recovery smoothies saved me from being too HANGRY. Now, let me tell you…towards the end of this past month, I’ve been sluggish, feeling really slow, bloated, and just all around not like myself. After 3 days, of clean eating…i’m already getting back to the “normal” me. So…with all that being said…I want to talk about my “resolution”. Because….my weight and fat/muscle ratio is not just a once a year thing…it is something I look at and work towards all year (except Christmas, lololol). And this little post…is not about weight or diet plans!

My resolution…is Jiu Jitsu. I started “learning” a bit over a month ago. In my brain, I always feel that I cannot tell people what to do in kickboxing, if it is something that I am not able to do myself. So, I own Team R.O.C. How do I expect to be a leader, if I am not putting myself out there to learn this aspect of what is done at our school?? I have been taking Muay Thai for a few years now…and LOVE LOVE LOVE it. Kickboxing, well, if you’ve seen my facebook page…you’d think I wake up kickboxing and continue until I shut my eyes. (kind of feels like it some days)

So, back to Jiu Jitsu….here I am. I can watch it…and pretty much know what’s going on…I mean my kids have grown up on the mats. I’ve been to 947,000 of their classes. I watch the kids class daily. I watch the adult class. I go to tournaments. I watch MMA fights. So…I should be able to have some knowledge right????? WRONG!!!!!! I froze. I completely froze….and everything I thought I would know, was gone. I left it somewhere else. There’s also the whole “touching” aspect of this sport. I’m really not a huggy, touchy feely person. If I haven’t seen you in a while…cool, i’ll throw a hug your way, or reciprocate. However….I don’t need a hug daily from you…as an adult….to say hi. Sorry….just me. And Jui Jitsu, to me…was all the “hugs”…non-stop along with “close talking”, all while trying not to either get put to sleep, my face crushed, my arm twisted, etc, etc, etc. (and breathing, you’ve got to keep breathing. holding your breath is never a good thing) So, even though, we are shown, and taught, how to get into positions, and then take a submission, I spend my time, just trying not to get caught in anything. The more I was out on the mats during class, the more frustrated I would be afterwards, especially, if I gave into my fears, and just sat there watching. I am by no means a quitter. I also have this little fire inside of my, that absolutely HATES not being able to do something. I had gotten so frustrated with my own self… I went to the gym the next Tuesday, built a bridge, and got over whatever it was making me freeze. Then I lit that bitch on fire….so I couldn’t go backwards! I won’t ever let my own self stand in my way of things I want to do. I’m really thankful that there are good people out there on the mats with me…people who have an extreme amount of patience, tolerance, and knowledge. I am really glad also, that there’s a group of people who all jumped into this at the same time as me. They’re encouraging and helpful. I like to say we support, push and motivate eachother, both physically and mentally. What they don’t realize is they motivate me alot more than they know. I also know….that if I can do this….anyone can.

So, for 2019, if you are scared, of anything, not just Jiu Jitsu…sometimes you just have to take a deep breath, and suck it up. What’s the ablsolute worst thing that will happen? You’ll suck at it??? People will be watching you???? The answer…yup, you may suck at it…but keep trying…do what you can….eventually…you’ll get it (I have a LONG way to go) and yes…people might be watching you…think about it…you might be giving someone else the courage to go do something they’ve always wanted to but have been afraid to try. In my life…I want to keep going forward. Getting better. That’s not just 2019…that’s always. but 2019 is the year I’ll “get better” at Jiu Jitsu. Until that day…if the need arises…i’ll just throw an elbow…i’ve got that down!!!!!

A year in review

Let me just start by saying…i’ve started this blog…clueless on how to get it going. it may or may not end up being visible…so let’s hope i get it right.

I decided to start up my blog after realizing over the past several weeks…i’ve got so much that i want to type out in statuses on the FB, but i never could get it all in one status. and let’s be honest, nobody likes FB statuses that are like books….say what you want to say, make it short and sweet and move on. i tend to be a bit long winded sometimes with my thoughts…so i figured this was the best way to convey them.

So, 2018…my year in review…I have been insanely busy…in a really good way. I call my life organized chaos. I have worked my ass off, non stop it seems at times. But in all honesty….I thrive on that lifestyle….go…go….go….go….go

This was our 2nd year as owners of Team R.O.C. Eden, and we have had a pretty good year, all in all. There have been ups and downs…blah blah blah…

We have had four 90 day challenges…and as always we have had people who roll up onto the mats and just blow us away….and then some who come on in…and then…well…um…ghost. Now, for me, I love it when people come in…commit to what they want to accomplish and then crush their goals.

This year i’ve been part of our Merchants association….in the past year, ive seen our street become a little more alive than it has been in so many years! We’ve hosted a food truck rodeo, 2 car shows, and a halloween trick or treating parade. we had an estimated 400+ people show up for that little event. Compared to last years 75! 2019, let’s get it…The Blvd is slowly but surely coming back to life!

I really truly have the best people in my life….the constant support from my friends, even when i’m caught up in moments of insanity, which show up quite frequently, is unwaivering. It’s really super rare that i’ll ask for help….with anything. delagating tasks and jobs just is not something i’ll ever get used to doing. But, i am surrounded by a crew of people, who somehow always know when I truly need something done. It always falls in place like a puzzle. For these people in my life…i’m truly grateful. It takes a special kind of person, who will just say, hey…you need this done…and i’m gonna go ahead and do it, without causing my OCD to wake up….and freak out a bit!

Cakes. Cookies. I have made a LOT of cake this year. i have made a LOT of gingerbread cookies in the past several weeks. This year…i intend to slow down the cake biz just a bit….as much as i like to think i can take it all on….there just aren’t enough hours in the day. I’ve got to focus a bit more on gym stuff. And taking on too many cakes, takes too many hours. I’ll still be making them…just a bit less….

Fights…this year we focused having our fighters on the Spartyka Card. This year….the same. However, with our lessons from the past year, changes are being made, for the better obviously, tweaking a few things that need tweaking….and will be taking some W’s inside that arena! Again, the unwaivering support for our fighters….is incredible. those who are in the gym with them, watching, seeing what they go through….I cannot express the gratitude myself and they have for you as well.

So….i know this is probably NOT the most exciting blog in history. I’m hoping they get a little better as it am going to try to focus on one thing per article….as this one jumped all over! So…thanks for reading til the end…i’ll get a little better at this as i go…..i hope!